Seven things I hate about house selling

Some Monopoly houses on a board.

Our house has been on the market for several months and, although there have been a lot more viewings lately, we’re still nowhere near moving.

Sometimes we need to rant about things to get them out of our systems, so this is what I intend to do today.

I think there’s a direct correlation between our attempts to move and the increase in white hairs on my beard and temples, so I feel justified.

Here, then, are seven things I hate about house selling.

The hope

I’ve been a Tottenham fan for well over 30 years so I know all about the folly of getting my hopes up. But it’s so hard not to. Whenever the phone rings, we think it’s our friendly estate agent calling to book a viewing.

It’s not, of course. It’s usually a frankly pathetic attempt at a scam. Top tip for wannabe confidence tricksters: if you’re claiming to be from British Telecom, don’t use an American robot voice. You’re welcome.

Keeping things tidy

With three children, it’s impossible to keep things perfectly tidy and, given the short-notice nature of some viewings, we end up running around like blue-arsed flies getting everything as presentable as possible.

As a result of this frantic tidying, my phone charger often goes missing. We also lost youngest’s favourite plastic plate for a week. It turned out that she had ‘helped’ by hiding it under the sofa.

People who don’t do their research

It’s galling when people cancel at the last minute. A couple recently arrived and decided that the road – which is at least 20 feet away from our front door and separated by a garden, two pavements and a grassed area – was too close.¬†They didn’t even bother looking around!

With Rightmove, Google Street View and even the printouts from estate agents for the Internet-deniers of this world, there’s no excuse for not having at least a vague idea of what a property¬†is like.

One particular question

I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve been asked a particular question by well-meaning folk making small talk. For the record, it’s “Have you found anywhere yet?” Of course we haven’t.

There’s no point setting our hearts on a place when we don’t yet have a buyer for ours. Who would put themselves under unnecessary extra pressure like that? ARGH!

Other estate agents

We’re happy with the estate agent we’re on with and accept that Brexit is largely responsible for the painfully slow housing market. That doesn’t stop others from harassing us though.

We regularly get calls from one rival agent taking thinly-veiled digs at ours. We also have a steady supply of items for the recycling bin courtesy of unwanted letters from others.

Showing people around

Sometimes people request viewings at such short notice that the agents are all busy. We’d always rather have the viewings than not, so we have to show them around. And I just can’t stand the awkwardness of it. Or, for that matter, the unpredictability.

A couple of weeks ago, for example, after arriving half an hour late one guy just ran upstairs without me and his partner. I didn’t know what to say but, luckily, didn’t need to – he ran off again and showed himself out.

The feedback

I have conflicting feelings about feedback. It’s useful to know what people like and what needs improving.

But most of the things people pinpoint are purely down to personal taste rather than anything else.

The only feedback that I want to hear now is an offer.

Are you trying to move home at the moment? What do you hate about house selling?


  1. Richard Davis

    I agree it is definitely challenging to keep the house clean and organized especially if you have kids. Awesome blog by the way and thanks for sharing your experience.

  2. Pingback: Why buying new pants isn't a brief encounter | Diary of the Dad

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