My top five LEGO injuries

Two LEGO Stormtroopers carrying a third on a stretcher.

I’ve always loved LEGO and am delighted that the kids have got into it too. Perhaps inevitably with so much of the stuff and three children, it ends up everywhere. As a result, we’ve spent a lot of time recently finding missing pieces and reassembling sets.

I won’t lie; I really enjoy doing this. It’s a great way of spending time with the kids. Plus there’s a massive sense of triumph at locating elusive bricks and completing things once more. But the theory that you can’t have pleasure without some form of pain rings true.

Yes, I’m talking about LEGO injuries. It turns out that there are plenty of ways to hurt yourself with the iconic bricks.

Unhappy feet

Every parent knows the agony of finding even the smallest of bricks with your feet. We’ve had loads of the things scattered across the floor lately and, even when I’m wearing slippers, it smarts.

I’ve trodden on so many of the tiny but basically indestructible pieces lately that I’m ready to take part in a LEGO firewalk now.

Hard as nails

I wish the orange brick separators that are commonplace nowadays were a thing in the 1980s. I always had bent or smashed fingernails from trying to prise apart pieces that have apparently been welded together.

In fact, the same rings true now. Because we didn’t have said tools when I was a kid, they’re not in my muscle memories and I often neglect to use them.

My hips don’t lie

Our dining room table is simply too small for all the bricks we have so we sit on the floor. I think it’s nicer this way as it means we’re spending family time without a barrier between us. Oh, but my legs.

I don’t know whether it’s because I’m edging towards 40 or down to too much five-a-side, but sitting like this is excruciating. Every joint from the hips down aches. I’m still walking like a mini-figure days later.

One in the eye

I find staring into a huge pile of LEGO bricks while sifting through to find a specific piece to be very much like looking at a Where’s Wally? book.

I rarely find what I want, end up with eyestrain or a headache and end up feeling like said Wally.

Hair today…

How can these small, plastic bricks possibly cause damage to one’s hair, I hear you ask. Well, I’ll tell you. Within minutes of completing the most complex models, one of the kids will inevitably drop it.

Inevitably, this results in me tearing my hair out. I would say that I jump up and down on the spot too, but don’t want to risk stepping on any rogue bricks and doing myself further mischief.

Will all of these LEGO injuries stop me though? No chance. Now where’s that beige 1×2 plate with three teeth?

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