Our Christmas shopping trip via the medium of gifs

As I’ve said more than once recently, I hate Christmas shopping. However, we decided to brave the crowds at the weekend. As always, there were some odds and sods that we needed and we thought it would be quieter than next week.

When we learned that there was a Christmas market on outside our local shopping centre, that clinched it. “Brilliant!” we thought. “A nice family day out to get everyone embracing the festive spirit!”

To be fair, it wasn’t our most horrendous shopping trip ever. In addition, it wasn’t as crowded as it could have been.

But any romantic notions we had of a picture-perfect festive family outing proved to be just that and nothing more. Expectation and reality are two entirely different entities. Why do we never learn from these things?

Here’s how our Christmas shopping went via the medium of gifs…

It started with optimism and a strange youthful enthusiasm I hadn’t felt for a while.

This frivolity soon gave way to focus as we attempted to negotiate hordes of shoppers while remaining in our little group.

But, oh dear. Someone forgot their manners and jumped the queue while I was buying a snack for the kids. Of course I vociferously pointed this out and, of course, the perpetrator pretended not to hear.

Despite being rattled by this misanthropic act, we soldiered on. And then, success. A major item on the list was acquired.

This victory was short lived. Somebody who had been in the queue a few minutes beforehand had clearly had sprouts earlier than usual.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, this left us all in need of fresh air. A good time to taken in the Christmas market outside. Amelie had fallen asleep in the pushchair and the boys couldn’t have been less interested in it.

Instead, they were apparently dying of thirst. We dropped everything, got them a bottle of water each and they drank about this much before their need for H2O was quenched.

A short while later, a similarly urgent request followed. This time it was to go to the toilet. It wasn’t pleasant. The sprout eater must have also been there before us.

That was the final straw. We suddenly remembered why we always do everything online and decided to go home. Missing a train by seconds on the way, of course.

I have already made a note to myself to re-read this post in early December next year.

How did your Christmas shopping go?

1 Comment
  • Raj Sark
    December 20, 2017

    hilarious indeed. note to read every year!

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