The farce awakens

A man wearing a Star Wars hat and pretending to look pleased about it. The farce awakens.

A long time ago in a studio far, far away, a film was made about the forces of good and evil doing battle in space. It was quite successful and two more films followed. Followed years later by a second trilogy. And several more years later, another one.

As you can probably tell from my tone, I don’t really get what the excitement is about Star Wars. But, thanks to Dylan and Xander suddenly becoming aware of its existence, I’m having to feign enthusiasm.

That isn’t to say I dislike them. They just don’t resonate with me in the same way they do for millions of other people. The force is obviously weak with this one.

I’ve only seen three of the seven existing films so far. A New Hope, Empire Strikes Back and Phantom Menace, for the record. The inconsistent editing between scenes in the first two and Jar Jar Binks in the later effort put me off.

The films have become so engrained in culture that I pretty much know what happens in those that I haven’t seen – and even get a good number of references – but they just don’t inspire me.

Cut to recent weeks – with a simple crossfade, if you please – and my boys suddenly seem to know everything about the characters without having seen any of the films. Well, almost everything. Pronunciation remains an issue with some of them.

Dylan pointed to a picture of a beardy Jedi in a book he found at the library and confidently asserted that he was called “Obi Wanky Nobby.” Despite being sorely tempted to let him carry on thinking that, I pointed out the slight mistake. “These are not the words you are looking for,” I told him. I hope you’re proud of me, Star Wars fans.

I’m now regularly called upon to speak in Yoda word order. The fact that I speak German with its fascination with kicking the verb to the end helps here. I’m also required to do impressions of Chewbacca. Again, this doesn’t require too much effort as that’s how I look and talk first thing in the morning.

So the farce awakens. I’m soon going to know every last detail about something I’m not really interested in and am worried that it’s going to push some useful information out of my mind. This is only the beginning of such things, of course. The floodgates are now well and truly open.

Oh well, at least it’s not Star Trek…


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