I dream of sleep

An alarm clock.

Like most parents of young children, I don’t get as much sleep as I once did. I’ve kind of got used to it, but am starting to think that something needs to be done. Nobody should get used to thinking that four or five hours constitutes a good night’s rest!

Xander is 19 months old now and still doesn’t sleep through. Things have got even worse lately as, whatever we do, he refuses to go to bed. There have been quite a few instances of late in which Kate and I haven’t been able to sink into the sofa in crumpled, swearing heaps until gone 9pm.

Even then, our evenings and nights of sleep are short-lived. Three or four hours later, he’ll wake up and won’t go back to sleep in his own bed thereafter.

Consequently, neither of us sleeps brilliantly and we’re always aching as a result of him sleeping between us and skillfully pushing us out. It’s a never-ending nightmare!

We try everything too. The boys have a good end-of-day routine that we stick to. Neither of them wants for anything and Xander sees that Dylan goes to bed with minimal fuss. He copies everything else his big brother does, so why not this?

I think our problem relates to space – or lack thereof – and, for this reason, our house is on the market at the moment. We did want to move anyway, but the need for an extra room is too great! Dylan learned how to get himself to sleep in the first instance and back to sleep if he woke up in the night because he had his own room.

It happened quickly and he was sleeping through the night from about eight months. Unfortunately, we only have two rooms. It’s not fair on Dylan to let Xander keep him awake at bedtime, so we have to take him away, get him to sleep and then make like ninjas and sneak him into his bed. And the cycle continues.

Perhaps some of this is our fault for giving in too easily when he was really little and hardly sleeping at all in case he woke Dylan, but I think we can be forgiven for that. This cycle has to stop though!

So, dear readers, I’m appealing to you. Until we get a bigger house, what the hell are we supposed to do? Is there a genius technique that we can employ to break this resistant behaviour?

Do I need to chase him around the neighbourhood for an hour before bedtime to tire him out? At least please tell me that we’re not on our own in having an otherwise wonderful little one who thinks that sleep is for the weak!


  1. Notmyyearoff

    Chasing him round might not be a bad idea. Our Z will wake early unless he’s in our bed. Then he’ll have a massive lie in. I don’t really get why that happens. I’m half tempted to go sleep in our spare room double bed and just give him our bedroom!

    1. Post

      Oh for a spare room! I do wonder whether the draw is being with us or taking up as much as possible of our bed – I’ll have to put that theory to the test if we ever manage to move house!

  2. Garry

    I can sympathise with you there. My 3 year old will happily go to bed saying he’s getting in the big bed, I pop him into his own bed and read a story with him. In no time he is fast asleep only to wake a few hours later crying to get into the big bed with Mummy and Daddy. We have tried chasing him back to his own bed, but that took over an hour of crying and chasing around. Now we just scoop him up and pop him in between us. I am lost as to what to do as well because I know it can’t carry on. Sorry no help for you though, perhaps its yet another phase and they will soon settle down to a full night sleep. On the plus side, we have never done so much reading and certainly don’t miss the dirge on tv.

    1. Post
  3. David

    Oh that does not sound like fun. Like everyone else, I’m afraid I have no words of wisdom. Olivia needs company to fall asleep at the moment and struggles if she wakes in the night now.

    We have the baby too who is crap at sleeping unless it’s on a human, which does make the day a little tricky. We don’t know how to change it 🙂

    Hopefully someone will post something that will help all of us.

    1. Post

      Thanks David – it’s good to know that it’s not just us. If I find some miracle answer I’ll let you know!

  4. Laughing Owl

    Have you read the No Cry Sleep Solution? Its not a miracle cure… but helped us a bit, although sounds like you are already doing the routine side of things! Little Owl is still in our beds most nights but *sometimes* not until 5:20am!!!!!!

    Could you try Dylan in your room so you don’t have to worry so much about noise when Xander wakes?

    Good luck with the house hunt!

    1. Post

      Ooh, sounds intriguing – I’ll look it up. Unfortunately having Dylan in with us would mean swapping rooms – we have the smaller one so there’s not enough space. The no cry sleep solution sounds promising though so thank you very much for sharing!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.