It’s been ages since I last took part in a meme, so I was pleased to be tagged in this one by A Plucky Heroine. It’s a belter! Named, of course, after the nightmarish place in George Orwell’s classic novel, Nineteen Eighty-Four and the TV show in which celebrities banish things they don’t like to said room, the idea is to explain the things that would constitute your living hell.
I could use this as an opportunity to explore my darkest thoughts, but bemoaning some of life’s smaller irritations is much more me. Plus wandering about in the deepest, darkest recesses of my mind would take way too long and I may not come back. See? that got dark a little too quickly. Off we go with the things I’d like to send packing…
His politics, Big society, lying about eating baked goods in order to try and score points with us common people, leaving his daughter in a pub… there’s nothing redeeming about the man and Steve Bell’s portrayal of him with a massive condom over his head is spot on. Go on, Dave, sling your hook and take your dickhead mates with you.
Okay, it sometimes raises a half smile and has some great voice actors in it but, on the whole, I can’t stand it. Peppa is a brash little oik. Daddy Pig doesn’t do fathers many favours with his buffoonery and the bloody merchandise is everywhere. Unfortunately, it’s the only thing that shuts Xander up when he’s in a mood. As a result, I’ve seen every episode at least four times. I would go into my Peppa Pig/Lord of the Flies mashup idea, but I promised not to get dark.
Poor pavement etiquette
People who let their dogs crap all over the place and don’t clean it up. Adults who cycle on pavements and those who don’t say thanks when you step aside to let them past on narrow paths. They’ll all be first up against the wall come the revolution. Oh yes. Drivers who don’t indicate when there aren’t any other cars around can join them. Are pedestrians supposed to be psychic or something? ARGH!
There are plenty more things I would add. They include ‘footballers’ who make racist remarks, gesticulate, dive and bite others – okay, okay, Luis Suarez – people chucking non-recyclable waste in our recycling bin before I’ve had a chance to get it back in, rubbish data connections on train journeys when I have something ever so witty to tweet that is losing its relevance with every minute that ticks past. All the stuff of nightmares, I’m sure you’ll agree.
What would you put in Room 101?