There’s a sign on the wall at our local Mothercare that says something to the effect of ‘your baby won’t enjoy bath time at first but soon they won’t want to get out’. Well the first part is definitely true, albeit something of an understatement. Unfortunately, there’s no sign of the second becoming a reality as far as Dylan is concerned. It’s somewhat ironic that his name means ‘man from the sea’; he seems to absolutely hate water!
He can be happy as Larry – I’ve always wondered who Larry is and why he’s so damn chuffed the whole time. But put him in a small amount of water and waterworks of his own are fully operational within seconds.
Screams fill the air and his little legs go into overdrive making the bath the driest part of the room, while his facial expression seems to say “How could you do this to me, you evil people?”
He’s nearly nine months old – surely he should like baths by now? Of course, we always make sure the water is the correct temperature and have tried different bath lotions to find one that won’t dry his skin. We also give him things to play with in an effort to distract him from the fact that he is sitting in his nemesis, but none of this has worked yet.
So with the logical approach yielding nothing, I’ve been doing the blokey thing of trying to think of some more leftfield reasons as to why he loathes the bath so much. I still haven’t come up with a satisfactory explanation though.
He hasn’t seen any of the Jaws films so it can’t be fear – besides, he’s the only bitey customer in the water. Neither can it be body issues – he’s way too young to develop dysmorphia. The only vaguely credible one I’ve come up with is that I’m not keen on large expanses of water and maybe he had inherited my angst about it. That’s still tenuous at best though.
Maybe I’m overanalysing here and he’ll eventually like bath time. Knowing our luck with his apparent enmity for water though, that’ll be right before he becomes a soap-dodging teenager…