Am I becoming The Evil Dad?

I was doing some tidying yesterday when I was hit by a realisation. I’m losing my soft edge. I found a mountain of kid art and had no hesitation in putting it in the recycling bin. Normally, I would go through every last one and rescue a few, but not this time. In they went with the empty plastic milk bottles and Tory election propaganda.

This, alongside other recent evidence has led me to the belief that I’m becoming The Evil Dad. Okay, I’m not evil. Far from it. I think I’ve just become more businesslike. But ‘The Slightly Less Soft Dad’ has less of a ring to it. Plus, given the number of posts I’ve written based on horror films, it’s pretty rude that I haven’t acknowledged Sam Raimi’s classic until my seventh year of blogging.

Anyway, here’s further said evidence.

A post shared by Tom Briggs (@diaryofthedad) on

At the weekend, I spent hours finding all the pieces of Dylan’s LEGO Batmobile and putting it together for him. He wanted it to be assembled but was, and I quote, “too tired”. This level of fatigue didn’t stop him from regularly checking on my progress and telling me to hurry up, of course.

Once the Dark Knight’s motor was fixed, I gave serious thought to sticking the bloody thing together with superglue. Yes, I know that’s what the baddie in The LEGO Movie does with the ‘Kragle’, but I didn’t care. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve had to search the whole house for pieces and remake it.

Rewind a few weeks and there is another parenting crime to confess to. I ate one of the kids’ Easter eggs. In my defence, they had a ridiculous number of them. Plus my teeth have already had it. And my mum has type two diabetes. Oh, and there was no wine in the house. “I’ll swallow your soul!” shriek the grotesque enemies in the aforementioned cult film. I wouldn’t go that far, but I had no qualms about swallowing a chocolate egg!

A bag of dirt.

Back to yesterday and Xander came home from school with a rather unusual present for me. An actual bag of dirt. His class had been enjoying a forest school afternoon and he thought I’d want a souvenir. Try as I might, I couldn’t hide my WTF? face and didn’t try and sugar coat it. He knows my feelings on mud kitchens after all.

The last time I slept well on a regular basis was almost seven years ago. Has the cumulative sleep deprivation finally taken its toll? It’s the best explanation I can muster for my shift into no-nonsense parenting.

So am I The Evil Dad? Of course not. I love my kids to bits and will probably let them get away with more than I should. But I’ve become less of a soft touch and am quietly pleased to have done so.

Hail to the king, baby.

7 Comments
  • Nige
    May 17, 2017

    Loving this Tom I too have no hesitation binning the crap that is brought home from school so I guess I must be up there with you as a evil dad haha! Great idea for the Lego I think that should be compulsory fab read mate

  • John Adams
    May 20, 2017

    Well, er, if you’re the Evil dad I must be too. I’ve done pretty much everything you mention in your post, apart from gluing together a LEGO model. That, by the way, is a genius idea.

  • Jodie
    May 20, 2017

    Omg the art work!!! I save it all up in designated boxes and once a year go through it! It’s ALWAYS on my mind. I literally have a cupboard full of it at the moment and I swear if I don’t sort it the hinges are going to pop off the doors!

  • Sophie Wheeler
    May 20, 2017

    This definitely makes me an evil Mum then! Haha! Great post!

  • Alice Soule
    May 20, 2017

    I love the random things kids bring home! My daughter went through a soap grating obsession and cane home with envelopes full of the stuff. Gee thanks

  • Mummy in a tutu
    May 20, 2017

    No not an evil dad at all. Just less of a newbie x

  • Mrs Lighty
    May 20, 2017

    Ha! I wonder if this comes to all of us over time!! Although I did have a silent inward scream of “noooooo!” When I thought you were going to superglue the Lego together!!

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